it's just my face

In February I began a quest to start running.  This decision changed my life forever.  I must say it was not an easy thing to commit to.  I had many reasons not to do it.  Here are the reasons it took me so long to start running.  These thoughts played over and over in my head every day. I can't run because I'll only make it a block before I get tired I can't run because someone might see me struggle. I can't run because I'm too fat. I can't run because I don't have time. I can't run because I have a bad back and it may injure it. I can't run because I can't breathe when I run. I can't run because shin splints hurt. I can't run because my boobs are too big. I can't run because I'm already on my feet for 10 or 12 hours a day at work.  Running will only put more strain on them. I can't run because there's no way I will be able to work up enough stamina to make it worth it. Let me tell you, even WRITING...

Recently, You and I had a conversation concerning money.  You were afraid that you were going to be sent to jail for non-payment of child support.  Non-payment of $73 a month.  All that you are legally obligated to pay to financially support your son is $73 a month.  This is insulting to me and to your son.  Even more insulting is that you claim to be unable to afford said money each month.  Bullshit!  You CHOOSE not to afford this money every month.  Choosing to instead spend your money on things like alcohol, vacations, dinners out, partying.  I see where your son lies on your list of priorities.  Towards the bottom.  One of the things I suggested to you was that you get another job.  A second job to help support yourself and help you support your son.  Your response to that was, "then I will never get to see my son"  Really?  when do you see him now?  Not as often as you COULD.  Another choice...

There's been something on my mind and I've been struggling for the right words to get it out.  This is the third different blog entry for the same thoughts.  I didn't post the others.  I hope it comes out right this time. What's the deal with men?  Honestly.  They really are weak creatures.  Don't get me wrong, women can be too.  But I laugh at the amount of crazy, weak, insecure males that I see around me.  Maybe there's a sign on my forehead, or an invisible beacon that says I'll listen.  Maybe I'm too nice.  I do listen.  And I laugh, and I share my thoughts.  And somehow I end up being tossed aside when I am no longer needed to listen.  And I end up feeling hurt and used. It seems like every man I know turns to me to pour their heart out when they are having women troubles, they attempt to get into my pants (unsuccessfully).  And then pretend they don't know me anymore when things are smoothed over w...

I coordinate my underwear with my outfits.  I wear specific undies with specific dresses.  There are zebra stripes for sassy days and lace for sexy days.  I have plain ones for when my Aunt is visiting and nude ones for white pants.  A lot of thought goes into my undergarments on a daily and weekly basis.  During the 40 day quest one of the things that I did not plan was my underwear wardrobe.  The plainer the better.  If I'm not feeling very sexy, I will not attract sex.  Right?  Wrong. The night I spent with Dimps , I was wearing the biggest pair of underwear I own!  I believe I took them from a sail boat in the harbor earlier in the evening.  I mean, I can tuck my BOOBS into these suckers.  They were plain and black and comfy and rival the kind my grandmother wore.  HUGE!  In my frantic attempt to escape the house without waking a sole that morning, I could not locate my skivvies and so I fled the scene.  I ...

In January I asked to participate in something that changed my life forever.   I was feeling very down and alone so I reached out to one of my best friends.   Within our conversation, she told me about the Warrior Dash and emailed me a link to check it out.   I looked at the link and laughed, “There’s no way you can do this!” I then looked at the pictures on the Facebook page.   There was one woman in particular that stood out to me.   She was overweight and CLEARLY out of shape.   She did it.   “Maybe I can do this,” I thought.   If I train and prepare myself I can do this.   So the next I scraped together my $50 and registered myself for the July 30, running of the Warrior Dash in Mt. Morris, MI.   I had seven months to prepare.   The Warrior Dash is a 3.1 mile race with 12 obstacles dispersed throughout.   I couldn’t run a block without feeling like death!   I had seven months to prepare. I did some research online abou...