Honestly
This world is a crazy, judgemental place. There are so many different thoughts and beliefs about intimate relationships and how they "should" be. They "should" be between a man and a woman. The man and woman "should" get married. They "should" stay married forever and ever. They "should" buy a house, have children, build a white picket fence and live happily ever after. I know I'm not alone in this, but I don't believe this to be truth. I don't believe that a man and a woman are supposed to be together forever. Maybe I'm jaded, but I just don't think it's possible to maintain a fun, exciting relationship ONE person for fifty years or more. Heck I don't ever think it's possible for 10 years! Not without a little side action.
Another word for monogamy in the thesaurus is restraint. Monogamy is overrated.
Men get a bad rep for being the cheaters in a relationship. In my honest opinion, women do it too. Cheating is emotional as much as it is physical. Men are not as emotionally attached to sex as women, therefore it is not as offensive to a man. I believe that "sex" is something different to everybody. It is considered to be offensive to commit the act of sex with someone who is in a relationship. I personally believe that sex is just an act of physical pleasure, similar to drinking a beer or eating your favorite dessert. I feel it is far more offensive to engage in an intimate emotional relationship with no physical interaction with another person than it is to get physical. Sex is not emotional for me. Passion is possible without carnal copulation.
In order to maintain a monogamous relationship, one must practice restraint, male or female. People have many desires and needs. If those needs are not being met, it's hard not to find a way to get those needs met. Even if it's turning outside of the relationship. Emotional or Physical, it's deceiving. It's cheating.
Security. Faith. Chivalry. They no longer exist in today's relationships. Marriage is disposable. It is what it is. I did not create it.
So when does the line of friendship cross the line into cheating? I think anytime you feel you need to be dishonest with your partner about something, you are cheating. Honesty is always the best policy. If you have to lie to someone or hide something, then what is the point? True happiness comes when you can be your true self, be who you are.
I think in order to truly achieve monogamy, one must be completely honest. Once a lie seeps in, no matter how big or small, no matter what the intention, it taints the relationship and it's all down hill from there. There are several happy monogamous relationships that surround me in my life. They didn't get it right on the first try, but they figured it out. I am optimistic that I will be capable of monogamy some day. Until then, I will continue to strive for honesty with myself so that I am capable to be honest with another.
Another word for monogamy in the thesaurus is restraint. Monogamy is overrated.
Men get a bad rep for being the cheaters in a relationship. In my honest opinion, women do it too. Cheating is emotional as much as it is physical. Men are not as emotionally attached to sex as women, therefore it is not as offensive to a man. I believe that "sex" is something different to everybody. It is considered to be offensive to commit the act of sex with someone who is in a relationship. I personally believe that sex is just an act of physical pleasure, similar to drinking a beer or eating your favorite dessert. I feel it is far more offensive to engage in an intimate emotional relationship with no physical interaction with another person than it is to get physical. Sex is not emotional for me. Passion is possible without carnal copulation.
In order to maintain a monogamous relationship, one must practice restraint, male or female. People have many desires and needs. If those needs are not being met, it's hard not to find a way to get those needs met. Even if it's turning outside of the relationship. Emotional or Physical, it's deceiving. It's cheating.
Security. Faith. Chivalry. They no longer exist in today's relationships. Marriage is disposable. It is what it is. I did not create it.
So when does the line of friendship cross the line into cheating? I think anytime you feel you need to be dishonest with your partner about something, you are cheating. Honesty is always the best policy. If you have to lie to someone or hide something, then what is the point? True happiness comes when you can be your true self, be who you are.
I think in order to truly achieve monogamy, one must be completely honest. Once a lie seeps in, no matter how big or small, no matter what the intention, it taints the relationship and it's all down hill from there. There are several happy monogamous relationships that surround me in my life. They didn't get it right on the first try, but they figured it out. I am optimistic that I will be capable of monogamy some day. Until then, I will continue to strive for honesty with myself so that I am capable to be honest with another.
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